My Father’s Lap

I awaken to the sensation of tears on my pillow. I realize that I have been crying in my sleep again. The hurt and the pain are just too much. My heart is hurting and I can’t catch my breath. I start to hear their words echo in my head…”You were never there for me”, “I don’t love you anymore”, “What do you want now?”, “I’m busy” and “Why can’t you just be like normal people?”. The echoes cut me like a knife and I can’t help but to sob. I wonder what I’ve done wrong. Why did everyone leave me? Then I pray for You to make me a better person so people will love me and come back. Continue reading “My Father’s Lap”

Come to the Table

I awake in the morning to the sound of bird song. I sit up and look around the room You prepared for me. It’s warm and inviting and as the sunlight streams through my window I feel content but as I arise to start my day, I feel pain in my body, my mind and my heart…then I remember…the long battle. I try to shake the images of the battle from my mind but it doesn’t work and I start to panic. Then I hear You humming in the kitchen. The sound of Your humming is like the Balm of Gilead. It soothes my heart, my body and my soul. A gentle breeze of Your shalom touches me and I arise from my bed. Continue reading “Come to the Table”

What if I Told You

What if I told You
What if I told you that you were born to be royal? What if I told you that your Father is King?
Would you believe me? Would you dare to care or would you dare to fling
Your inheritance far from where you stand, hoping for solid ground but finding only sand?
What if I told you that you were born with a purpose greater than you know?
Would you believe me? Would you dare to care or would you just go
Your own way doing your own thing? All the while forgetting your Father is King?
What if I told you that your life has a destiny to be fulfilled?
Would you believe me? Would you dare to care or would you
Fill your life with worthless things? All the while forgetting your Father is King?
What if I told you that you were unconditionally loved?
Would you believe me? Would you dare to care or would you just go
Shove your Father’s love aside? All the while forgetting that He died?
What if I told you that He rose from the grave just for you?
Would you believe me? Would you dare to care or would you just go
Ignore the cross? All the while feeling unloved and lost.
What if I told you were born to be royal, that your Father is King
Would you believe me?

No More Shame

“Who am I O Lord that you would be mindful of me?
You say Your love for me is true, but I just can’t see how that can be.
I know the shameful things I’ve done.
Horrible things that cost You You’re one and only son.
I hang my head in shame.
Trying to tune out Your voice as you call my name.
I can’t look at you. I can’t let you see
All the ugly that is inside of me.” Continue reading “No More Shame”

My Masterpiece

I awake in the middle of the night to the sound of my Father’s pottery wheel.  I leave my bed and follow the sound to His workshop.  The smell of water and clay is a sweet aroma.  I see Him at the wheel praying over a piece of clay.  I walk over and watch His hands.  His hands are large and covered in clay and water.  He looks at me and smiles.  I ask Him what He is doing and He says, “Making a masterpiece.”  I watch as His hands work the clay and I begin to witness the making of a masterpiece.  He slowly forms the clay from the bottom up, never rushing.  With great care the vessel starts to form.  I watch as He removes pieces that will hinder the use of the vessel.  He begins to sing over the clay, “I know the plans I have for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.  You will be my masterpiece.”  Before I know it, I’m singing with Him.  As we sing, the vessel takes a beautiful shape and He delights in my excitement at the work of His hands.   Continue reading “My Masterpiece”

The Battlefield

The battle is fierce.  I look around and see all who have fallen, my heart melts with fear.  I hear Your voice on the battlefield telling us to be encouraged, to keep our eyes fixed on You.  You raise your gold shield to defend that which is Yours.  I run closer to You when something catches my attention.  I look away from You for just a second and I am pierced by an arrow of the enemy and I fall to the ground.  I try to get on my feet only to I fall back to the earth.  You look over Your shoulder and tell me, “Child, get back up!”  Again, I try to rise but the pain and the fear are unbearable.  I sink into back to the ground and sob, “I’m sorry Lord. I can’t.”  Continue reading “The Battlefield”

Love in the Wilderness

Dear one, I know you have felt alone, maybe even abandoned, but beloved I do not leave or forsake my children.  I am with you in every season you walk through.  I know you view the wilderness as punishment but it’s not.  I lead you into the wilderness to have you to Myself.  The wilderness is where we work together.  It’s where we talk and pray together. I was with My Son in the wilderness for 40 days and look what we accomplished!  The wilderness is where I get to love you and have you all to myself.  Remember, I am a Jealous God and I will not share you with another.  Do not despise the wilderness instead embrace it for I am there.

First Love

Beloved, I remember when you would not so much as take a step without asking Me if you were supposed to. Nothing shook your walk with Me. You were steadfast – immovable. I long for more of those days. I long for your first love, but something has shifted. I am the same yesterday, today, and forever. I have not changed or moved. My heart toward you has not changed. I am ever with you, and I will never forsake you. I have blessed you and bestowed spiritual gifts on you. I have remained the same.  Continue reading “First Love”